Messages In the Wind

Chapter Three

"Hey, dude, could you get lost for a couple of hours this evening?" Kyle asked.

"Why in the hell do you want me to get lost for a couple of hours?" I asked, although I had a pretty good idea.

"I have this date with Kendra," Kyle grinned, "and I think she's ready to sleep with me."

"Alright, then. I do need to go to the library," I replied. For the life of me, I couldn't see what Kyle saw in Kendra. Even if I were straight I wouldn't be interested in someone like her. It wasn't that she was ugly, although she was. She was at least twenty pounds overweight, and always dressed like she was going to feed the pigs or something. She could also be a bossy bitch. I guess I was also envious that she was with Kyle and I wasn't. I think I've mentioned how hot Kyle is before.

"You have exactly two hours," I told Kyle. "Then I'm back in the room, regardless."

"As bad off as I am, it shouldn't take long," Kyle joked.

"I don't know why that would be after all that monkey spanking I heard from your side of the room last night," I teased.

"Get the out of here," Kyle said as his face turned red from embarrassment. "Besides, it's not like you don't do it too."

"Yeah, but I don't tell my hand how much I love it," I teased as I grabbed my laptop and headed out the door.

I decided to make good use of my two hours and get a start on a paper that I had to do for one of my classes. I found a quiet corner of the library and was typing away on my laptop when I had a sudden feeling that someone was staring at me. I looked up and saw this really cute boy at the next table drop his head down. I wasn't sure, but I thought he may have been eyeing me.

I continued with my work and the next time I looked up, he was definitely gawking. I guess growing up on the farm in rural Nebraska I'd never developed my gaydar. But I did sense that this boy was interested in me. I'll admit that just thinking about Kyle back in the room making love to Kendra made me envious. This boy wasn't nearly as hot as Kyle, but he was sexy - just in a different way.

I again looked up just as Mr. Ogle Eyes dropped his head. He then began to gather up his books and papers and stuff them into his book bag. Then picking up a pair of crutches from the floor, he struggled with the book bag while balancing himself on the crutches. His leg was in a fresh looking cast, so I figured that the injury must be a recent one. Just as he got even with me he lost his balance and came crashing down on me. "Well crap," he said. "Man, I'm sorry, but I just got these damn things and I'm still learning to use them."

"That's okay," I said. "Here, let me help you with these things. How in the world did you manage to get here with that book bag while using crutches?"

"My roommate helped me and then she left to meet her boyfriend," he said. "It just never occurred to me that I'd have this much trouble."

"It's obvious you're not going to make it on crutches with that big book bag. Let me help you to your car," I offered.

"Damn, I just remembered that I rode with my friend," he said in despair.

"I'm finished here; could I give you a ride?"

"Are you sure you don't mind?" He asked. "I live on the other side of town."

"This isn't a big town, the other side is just a few blocks," I laughed.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he said with a smile. "Thanks."

I picked up his book bag while saying, "I'm Tyler Lucas."

"I'm Matt Carlton," Matt said as he extended his hand and then lost his balance, falling against me again. "Well, crap, I'm going to break something else if I don't learn to use these things. I guess I'm just a klutz anyway. I did this when I was carrying something to put in my car and missed a step."

I managed to get my laptop, Matt's book bag, and Matt to my Jeep without him falling again. As I took his arm to help him into the Jeep I could tell that he had a nice firm body. It wasn't muscular like Kyle's, but still nice. Oh yeah, he had a cute butt too.

"Do you need to stop for anything?" I asked as I started the Jeep.

"I'm starving, so if you don't mind I'd like to stop and get something to eat," Matt said. "I can get it to go, if you're in a hurry."

"No hurry," I said as I looked at my watch and realized that I still had an hour to kill. "Where do you want to go?"

"How about the Pizza Hut?" Matt asked. "You know we don't have many choices in this town."

"Pizza Hut sounds fine to me," I said.

I helped Matt out of the Jeep, and he again fell against me when he lost his balance. I was beginning to think that this was on purpose. Maybe the little guy really was gay.

Matt and I had chatted for more than an hour when he finally said, "Hey, I guess I'd better get back to the apartment."

"Damn, you're lucky you don't have to go back to a dorm," I said.

"Living in an apartment doesn't cost much more than a dorm," Matt offered. "Especially if you have a roommate."

"It would be for me, since room and board is part of my scholarship," I explained.

"Oh, what type of scholarship?" Matt asked.

"Football," I said.

Matt laughed and said, "I thought you looked like a football jock."

I delivered Matt to his apartment and helped him in with his book bag, then went back to the dorm. Kyle was reclining on his bed and said with big grin, "Thanks for giving me some time, but you didn't have to be gone this long."

"I didn't know how long it would take you to have your way with Kendra, so I stopped for some pizza," I teased.

Kyle and I were on our way to football practice when I observed Matt with his crutches. He was maneuvering with a lot more skill. "That's Kendra's roommate," Kyle said when he saw me looking in Matt's direction.

"Matt is Kendra's roommate?" I questioned.

"How do you know Matt?" Kyle asked.

"Oh, I don't really know him," I said. "I gave him a ride home from the library the night you were shagging Kendra."

Kyle laughed and said, "I was beginning to wonder why you would know the little faggot."

"Matt's gay?" I asked, but I really wasn't surprised.

"According to Kendra he is," Kyle said. "They've been friends since they were in high school in Scottsbluff."

"He seemed nice enough when I gave him a ride," I said. I wanted more information, but was afraid to ask.

"Yeah, he's okay, I guess," Kyle said. "He just isn't my type, if you know what I mean," he said with a grin.

"Why didn't you and Kendra do it in her apartment the other night since he was at the library anyway?" I asked.

"She didn't know he was going to the library, and she didn't want to ask him to leave since he'd just broke his leg," Kyle explained.

"Hey, Tyler," Matt called as I was leaving the library one evening. He was now in a walking cast and ambulating well.

"Well hello, Matt, I see that you're getting around much better."

"Yeah, and this damn thing comes off in a couple of weeks," Matt grinned.

"I was just going to see what garbage they had in the cafeteria, would you care to join me?" I asked.

"Oh, hell no, I don't eat that stuff," Matt laughed. "My roommate took her boyfriend home to meet her parents since there isn't a game this weekend, and I hate eating alone. Would you care to come to the apartment for dinner?"

"I'd love to," I said. "Kyle didn't tell me that he was meeting Kendra's parents. This must be getting serious."

"Oh, I didn't know you knew Kyle and Kendra."

"Kyle's my roommate. He was shagging Kendra in our room the evening I met you at the library."

"Kendra is such a slut," Matt laughed. "But she's my best friend. You're right about this thing with Kyle being serious though. I've never seen Kendra like this before."

Dinner with Matt was nice. He served pork chops that were almost as good as Mom's, and I soon discovered that he was articulate, had a great sense of humor, and very intelligent. He was also a sophomore and majoring in biology.

Matt and I cleared the table, and while he was loading the dishwasher he brushed against me several times. And every time he bent over to load the dishwasher, I'd admire his cute butt. Once, as he rose up, he was looking directly into my eyes, so I pulled him to me and kissed him. When I finally pulled my mouth off his, he gasped, "I was hoping that you were gay. I wonder why Kyle hasn't mentioned that to Kendra?"

"Because I'm not out," I explained. "In fact, you're the first guy I've ever kissed."

"Was it that obvious that I'm gay?" Matt asked.

"No, not at all," I said. "Kyle told me that Kendra said you were. However, you did keep brushing against me at the library and then again tonight."

"I'm sorry, Tyler, I just can't help myself," Matt said. "You're so damn hot."

"You're pretty damn hot yourself," I said as I pulled him to me and deeply kissed him again.

"Stay the night with me," Matt pleaded.

"I thought you'd never ask."

"Are you sure you've never done this before?" Matt asked afterward while we were cuddling.

"Positive," I affirmed. "Well, when I was twelve and having my football physical, this doctor masturbated me," I said.

"No way," Matt laughed. "Really, when you were only twelve?"

We then did some more cuddling before drifting off to sleep. I'd never slept with a man before, or anybody for that matter, and it felt good to have his warm firm body next to me.

I woke to the fantastic smell of bacon and coffee and, for a moment, I thought I was back on the farm, smelling my mom's farm breakfast. I then realized that Matt was not in bed with me, so I followed my nose to the kitchen where Matt was busy turning eggs in the frying pan. When I kissed him on the back of his neck, he exclaimed, "Damn, you scared me," as he broke the yoke of one egg. "That was your egg that you just caused me to break."

"Are you going to tell Kyle about us?" Matt questioned.

"I don't think so," I said. I'm not sure how the guys on the football team would accept a homo on the team. I may say something after football season though."

"Kendra is a gossip, but if I tell her to keep her trap shut about this she will," Matt assured me.

"Kendra would do that for you?" I questioned. "You don't think she'd tell Kyle?"

"She wouldn't tell him if I asked her not to," Matt assured me. "And no, she wouldn't tell anybody if I ask her not to. She did say that she's told Kyle that I had the hots for a football player, but she didn't tell him who it was."

"How are the in-laws?" I teased Kyle when he entered our dorm room.

"Shut up," he said as he threw the pillow from his bed at me while laughing. "Kendra's parents are nice though. So, how was your weekend? Did you do anyone interesting?"

I laughed and tried to cover my embarrassment by saying, "You know I have no social life. But I had a good weekend. I did run into Matt and had dinner with him."

"Kendra said that Matt has the hots for some football jock," Matt teased. "It wouldn't be you, would it?"

I laughed and hoped Kyle couldn't see how red my face was from embarrassment. "Now, why would you think anyone would be interested in a farm boy like me?"

"Hey, I've seen how some of the girls here ogle you," Kyle said. He then added, "And some of the guys, including Matt."

"Shut up," I said as I threw his pillow back at him.

Matt and I seldom had much time alone with my football ... and there was always Kendra. We would sometimes meet when we knew that Kyle and Kendra would be on a date. We once drove out to some isolated farm road and made out in my Jeep. Needless to say, with my size, it wasn't the most comfortable make out session we'd ever had.

Once football season was over, Kyle and Kendra began to go off on their little love trips to Scottsbluff more often, so Matt and I had more time to be alone.

I was beginning to feel guilty for not going back home to see my parents. "I haven't been home in several weeks and I really do need to get home this weekend," I told Matt.

"I know, babe, and I understand, but I'll sure miss the hell out of you," Matt said. "Too bad you're not out so I could go with you."

"I know, sweetie," I said. "One day I'll tell them."

"I'd never pressure you," Matt said. "But the best thing I ever did was to come out to my parents. How do you think they'd react?"

"I have no earthly idea," I said. "Since I'm an only child, I guess it would be tough for them. I do know that they want grandchildren."

"Baby, if I could I'd help you give them grandchildren," Matt said.

"Honey, I know you would," I smiled. "But if you had what it took to do that I wouldn't be interested in you."

"We could get Kendra to be a surrogate for us," Matt said with some seriousness.

"Poor little guys would have to go around with a bag over their head if she were the mother," I laughed. "Oops, sorry, I shouldn't have said that about your best friend."

"Hey, I can't help it if my best friend is as ugly as a mud pie," Matt laughed. "Let's hope that if she and Kyle have kids they look like Kyle. He's pretty damn hot."

"I know," I agreed. "I had the hots for him until I met you."

"You would actually choose me over Kyle?" Matt asked.

"Now, I didn't say that?" I teased as I pulled Matt into an embrace and kissed him.

I called home to tell my parents that I would be home for the weekend, and I was surprised when my dad answered the phone. "Hi, Dad, I'm surprised that you're home this time of the day."

"I just got home," Dad said. "I took off work early to get some work done around here. It's good to hear from you, Tyler. When are you coming home?"

"I was just calling to tell you that I'd be there this weekend."

"We've missed you, Son, and we'll be happy to have you back home."

I knew I would miss being with Matt over the weekend, but I also was looking forward to seeing my parents. On Friday morning, I packed up my Jeep, planning on leaving as soon as my last class was over. "How many of you have your research project completed?" The professor asked. I and three other classmates indicated that we had completed ours. "You four may go, the rest of you are going to stay and give me a complete report of what you've done," she said.

In a flash, I was out of the classroom and in my Jeep driving east. My trusty old Jeep seemed to want to get home too, or maybe it was just my lead foot. I know I was driving at least ten miles per hour over the speed limit, probably more. I guess my mind was drifting between Matt and getting home, because suddenly there was a Nebraska State Patrolman behind me. There weren't many places for him to hide, but he was now behind me with flashing lights. The Nebraska State Patrolman exited his patrol car and said, "You were going a little fast there, any particular reason? I need to see your driver's license and proof of insurance."

"No, Sir," I admitted. "I guess I was just in a hurry to get back home from school." Damn, he was hot. He had huge biceps that looked like they had his uniform stretched to the limit, and I wanted to touch them badly when he extended his arm to take my license and insurance card.

"What school?" He asked.

"Chadron State," I said. "I'm there on a football scholarship." Why I added that last statement I'll never know, but it worked to my advantage.

"I played football at Chadron too," he smiled. "Okay, Tyler, have a safe trip and try to keep your speed down."

'Wow, that was pure luck,' I thought as I watched the officer's butt in my rearview mirror when he walked back to his patrol car.

I was surprised about how the farm looked when I arrived home. I hadn't noticed during my last visit, but there appeared to be a lot of work that needed to be done. It wasn't big things, just little things. I guess out of habit more than anything else, I started on chores just as I would have when I lived there. My horse, Bo, greeted me at the gate as if to beg me to ride him. "I'll ride you when I'm done with the other chores," I told him as if he could understand.

I had just finished my ride on Bo and headed back to the house when Mom and Dad arrived home. They both tried to hug me at the same time and we ended up in a three-way hug. "Son, you'll be graduating soon," Dad said as we walked to the house. "What are your plans after graduation?"

"I've sent my resume to a few places," I said. "A school in Omaha wants me to come for an interview."

"I ran into Coach Baumann and he wants you to consider an assistant coaching position," Dad said proudly. "The school also needs a chemistry teacher."

I'd never thought about coaching, but it might be worth thinking about. I wasn't sure about being gay and coaching, especially here in my home town. There was also Matt to think about. I wasn't sure that I loved him or that he loved me. I was very fond of him, but we had never said the "L" word. I saw the concerned look on the faces of both Mom and Dad. Dad then asked, "What's wrong, Son, you don't want to come back here to live?"

"It isn't so much that, Dad," I tried to explain without going into details. "I've never thought about coaching football, but I suppose I could do it."

"Tell him what Coach Baumann said about him," Mom insisted.

Dad smiled with pride and said, "Tyler, he said that he'd never had a smarter football player than you. He said that he'd had plenty that had been more athletic, but not smarter ones. He said that he would take a smart coach over an athletic one any day. You could live here and not pay rent."

I must have had an odd look on my face as I was thinking that it might be difficult bringing a guy home. I then decided this might be the right moment to tell my parents that I was gay. "Mom, Dad, there's something that I really need to tell you, and I hope you'll understand ... I'm ..."

Before I could finish, Dad said, "Gay? Tyler, we've suspected that for a long time. Who gives a rat's ass what you are. Your mom and I have discussed this and we don't care."

I had tears streaming down my cheeks when I said, "How did you know? Was I that obvious?"

Dad gave a nervous laugh, but before he could speak, Mom said, "Tyler, you never dated, you never showed any interest in girls, and we saw how you looked at nice looking guys."

I hugged both of my parents and said, "I just don't know how it would be with my being gay in this town. But I know that I should be here to help you with the farm."

"To hell with the farm," Dad said. "Excuse me, Susan," he added when he saw the look Mom gave him. "Tyler, we would only want you here because we love you. We don't want you here as a farmhand. I know you have no desire to be a farmer, we just want you to know that you have choices. Those choices are yours. If you want to consider the job in Omaha, by all means consider it."

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Mom asked as if it was as common as having a girlfriend.

I laughed nervously and said, "Yeah, Mom, I've been seeing someone."

"Is it your roommate, Kyle?" She asked. "I saw how you looked at him."

"No, Mom, it isn't Kyle," I said. "Kyle has a girlfriend. His name's Matt."

"Tyler, he would always be welcome here," Dad said. "It may seem strange to me, but I'd make him feel welcome."

"I know you would, Dad," I said as I put my arm around him, "and that means a lot to me."

Please send your comments or suggestions to Owen Hudson